Chapter 1: The Struggle
Sue and Josh stared at their Amazon book sales chart. The flat line mocked them daily. They had written good books—or so they thought. But no one was buying. Sue’s romantic comedies were stuck in a dark corner of the internet, and Josh’s self-help guides were gathering virtual dust.
One day, Bill, their life coach, showed up. “Have you seen Jacques lately?” Bill asked cryptically. Sue and Josh stared blankly. “Forget it,” Bill sighed. “You need a plan. A good one.”
Josh scratched his head. “I can do anything through the Anointed One who infuses me with strength,” he muttered, quoting some random thing he’d heard on a podcast. Sue rolled her eyes. Bill smirked. “You need more than quotes, buddy.”
Bill’s assignment: Come up with five ideas, try them, and report back. So, they brainstormed like it was the only thing keeping them from flipping burgers again.
Chapter 2: The Plan
Josh and Sue’s five brilliant ideas:
- Run Ads Everywhere: Social media, Amazon, maybe even on that weird radio station that only plays polka.
- Launch a Book Club: They would host discussions about their own books. Genius.
- Give Books Away: Free books would lead to more sales, right? Right?
- Email Newsletter: Because people love spam, apparently.
- Author Collaborations: Work with other struggling authors to cross-promote. Misery loves company.
Bill nodded. “Solid plan. Now, do it.”
Josh was pumped. “We’re redeemed from failure!” he declared, like a televangelist. Sue just wanted lunch. They dove into their strategy, clueless about the comedy of errors about to unfold.
Chapter 3: Results May Vary
A year passed. They sat in Bill’s office with stacks of data, coffee-stained notebooks, and an odd sense of dread.
Ads: Total disaster. They spent more on ads than they made in sales. “There was too much money in the drawer for me to leave without a key lying around,” Josh lamented, completely out of context but somehow fitting.
Book Club: Ten attendees, all named Josh. Three of them were actually bots.
Free Books: Thousands downloaded, but zero reviews and even fewer sales. “You would have had broken peace,” Bill noted. “And no confidence.” Josh didn’t know what that meant, but it sounded accurate.
Newsletter: One response, from Josh’s mom. She unsubscribed immediately.
Collaborations: It was like a group therapy session for unsuccessful authors. No one bought anything, but at least they cried together.
Bill sighed. “Sometimes He will, sometimes He won’t,” he said, whatever that meant. Josh and Sue’s faces fell. “Well,” Josh said slowly, “How would you know it’s God’s will for us to succeed?” Sue glared. Bill just blinked.
Chapter 4: A New Idea Emerges
Bill leaned back in his chair, looking like a man with a secret. “You tried everything but one thing,” he said mysteriously.
“What?” Sue and Josh asked in unison.
“Community. You need to stop selling and start connecting,” Bill said. Josh made a face like he’d just bitten into a lemon.
“What did He say?” Sue whispered. Bill ignored her. “You don’t have a sales problem. You have a people problem.”
“Is this a Bible study or a business meeting?” Josh quipped. But Bill was on a roll. “His Church will never lack the hands or resources to accomplish His will on earth,” Bill preached. Josh nodded like he understood. He didn’t.
Bill’s new idea: an online community where readers could talk, vent, and suggest book ideas. No sales pitches, just honest interaction. Sue shrugged. They had nothing left to lose.
Chapter 5: The Big Breakthrough
The community idea worked like magic. Readers loved it. They weren’t just buying books; they were connecting with Sue and Josh. Sales shot up, reviews rolled in, and suddenly, Sue was doing podcasts, and Josh was giving life advice that people actually wanted to hear.
A year later, they were invited to speak at an online conference about Amazon book sales. Sue and Josh faced the camera nervously.
Josh opened, “You’ve heard about ads, email lists, and freebies. But we’re here to tell you: that’s not it.”
Sue added, “The real key? People want to be seen. They want connection, not a sales pitch.”
Then Josh dropped the bombshell. “Here’s the thing no one tells you. The world is waiting, but we can breathe a little easier now. You don’t sell books. You make friends.”
The crowd went wild. Sue and Josh had discovered something obvious, yet groundbreaking. They shut the laptop with a grin. For once, their success wasn’t swallowed up by the world—it was built on it.
“God’s wireless,” Sue whispered. Josh blinked. “What?”
“Never mind,” she said, smiling. “We finally figured it out.”
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